You can say what you want about me but I'm the guy that does the jobs that have to get done.
Tuesday, August 24, 2021
Welcome To The World Christopher Alexander Johnson
Friday, June 11, 2021
An "Awesome" Dating Memory
The picture on this post is from one of MJ and I’s first dates. MJ’s mom called while we were on our date. MJ was drunk when she called. Not totally wasted drunk, but for sure inhibitions gone drunk. In the middle of what felt like was a somewhat serious call, MJ said- “Mom, I love Malia. I want to marry her. I saw her boob earlier when it fell out of her shirt. Her boob was awesome. She is awesome. We are having an awesome time. I love you ma. You are an awesome mom. I am sorry (MJ couldn’t remember who it was that was sick at the time, but he remembers it was someone from his family that lives in Tennessee) isn’t awesome. I hope she gets awesome again soon. Can I call you back tomorrow ma? I think our table is ready. We are at that awesome Oasis On The Lake restaurant. The sun is setting. It’s awesome on the eyes. I’ll text you a picture. I love you ma. Bye.”
After he hung up, he asked someone standing by us if they would take our picture so that he could send the picture to his mom. He handed the person his phone to take the picture, and we backed up to the railing. MJ asked me to hold his giant margarita glass because he didn’t want his mom to think he was drunk. I was laughing in the picture because I didn’t want his mom to think I was drunk either, and here I was the innocent one holding this giant margarita glass. I asked MJ why he handed me his drink. Wasn’t he worried about what his mom would think about me? MJ said- “I love my mom and I know she worries about me. I handed you the drink because I thought you would know what to do with it. You are my angel Malia May Johnson.” I said- “My last name isn’t Johnson.” MJ said- “Give it time. You gotta admit it has nice ring to it.
I remember telling MJ later that night that I was doing a good job of making him think it was his idea that we should be together. He said he didn’t care whose idea it was for us to be together, but whosever idea it was, it was a good idea.
Michael David Johnson, I will always hold your margarita, kiss you, make love to you, be with you, have your babies, have your back, be your sounding board, be your muse, listen to you, collaborate with you, do whatever, whenever, however with you and for you, for any and all reasons, and I have no doubt you feel the same way about me. 3-8-2012 forever!
Love,
Malia May Now My Last Name Is Johnson
P.S. MJ, I know when you look at this picture the first thought that goes through your mind is me naked wearing the “clod hoppers” shoes I have on in this picture, and I am okay with that, because you know my first thought when I see this picture is you wearing the boots you have on in this picture naked doing “The Dick Dance”. We’re penguins MJ, and you are never getting rid of me!
Our First Slow Dance – https://www.mjtheterrible.com/ourfirstslowdance/
Monday, April 5, 2021
You’ve Got To Stand For Something, or You’ll Fall For Anything by Malia May Johnson
Wednesday, December 9, 2020
"Mr. Right" by Malia May Johnson
Monday, December 7, 2020
Daddy Loves You With All of His Heart Little Princess Elizabeth Grace Johnson
This morning my brother from another Mother Marcus came over to drop something off.
Marcus saw my daughter Elizabeth, who's first word by the way was "Dada", and he immediately said - "Aww! Liz is adorable. The boys are going to be lined up around the block to ask her out when she gets older."
Listen here you little future perverts, who are only about 3 years old right now, and I might be 10-15 years early with this warning, but still, this Daddy right here, Uncle Marcus, Uncle Chris, Uncle Kosta, Uncle Kevin, Uncle Matt, Uncle Gary, Uncle CIA, Uncle US Army, Uncle US Airforce, Uncle US Navy, Uncle US Marines, Uncle US Coast Guard, Uncle US Space Force, and Uncle US Secret Service will be watching every single one of you horny little teenagers who try to deflower my little princess!
My little princess Elizabeth Grace Johnson will not be deflowered! I am the most protective Daddy on earth times 10!
I'm going to say it one more time for you future hardheaded horny teenagers who may try to make a move on my little baby girl.....My little princess will not be deflowered!
Malia walked in while Marcus and I were talking about all the bodyguards, snipers, cameras, satellites, drones, swimming friggin attack ducks, and other Anti-Deflowering Security measures we will be instituting.
Malia said someday a Prince Charming is going to come along, sweep her off her feet, and deflower her in a way that I will be able to live with.
Seal Team Six, y'all are on anti-sweeping her off her feet security detail. Feel free to use any and all means necessary to subdue the perpetrator trying to sweep my little Liz off her feet!
Malia also thinks she will marry someone just like her Daddy, because that is what little girls do. A little girls Daddy is her first love. I teared up and then I panicked. Liz, when you grow up marry a Doctor. God, please don’t let her fall in love with “Evil Eddie” or something.
Malia, you may be right that a Princess Charming may someday sweep my little princess off her feet, but he is going to have to go through the ultimate daddy's little girl protection gauntlet imaginable.
Malia, to answer your question if I will give my little princess away on her wedding day, and the answer is- Never!
In all seriousness, I hope my little Princess Liz finds the man of her dreams, and they live happily ever after, but I will be watching you Prince Charming/Man of My Daughter's Dreams!
I feel like the luckiest guy/daddy/husband/dude in the world!
Sincerely,
Michael "MJ The Daddy" Johnson
P.S. I really do love being a Daddy..... https://www.mjtheterrible.com/
P.P.S. Malia, thank you for making me a Daddy, and thank you for bringing such love and happiness into my life. I never knew true love until we met. You are the light of my life, the fire of my loins, and my penguin infinity forever until the end of days!
Sunday, November 29, 2020
Nice shooting baby!
Saturday, November 21, 2020
Baby Making Practice Invite For Michael David Johnson
This love video for you is red.
Your mom will be here to pick up the babies soon.
Now bring that sexy body home because I want to make a baby with you in the bedroom!
From: Your Loving Wife Always, But Today I'm Your Love Slave All Day Long!
P.S. You know how you made the "Baby Making Heat Scale" to measure my baby making heat horniness? Well, I just tested myself, and the scale exploded!
P.P.S. Dr. Frincke, you might wanna have the medical staff at Walter Reed on standby, because I'm about to do things to MJ that his body might not be able to handle!
Tuesday, June 5, 2018
My Favorite Quotes From People That I know Volume 10 by Michael "MJ The Terrible" Johnson
"If I play, I play to win. If I don't win the first time, then you can bet your ass I'm winning the next time around." Kristi IhaveonenamelikeMadonnabitch (A friend since college, and the only girl member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death)
"First the question is what. Then the question is why. Then the question is how." Gene Rockefeller (Close friend and an absolutely brilliant person)
"Living paycheck to paycheck is a now only situation, if you get your shit together, and start doing what you have to do to get shot done." Natalie Dupont Johnson (Queen Bee- It's a long story!)
"Forget revenge. That is karmas job. I am focused on getting shit done, and building my future." Natalie Dupont Johnson (Queen Bee- It's a long story!)
"I wasn't a very good cook, until I realized that butter, sugar, or salt, make just about everything taste better." Malia May Johnson (My wife, best friend, lover, mother of my children(I love you too CJ), nurse, doctor, confidant, my right hand wo-man, and just about anything else that one person can be to another person)
"I always look for the people who are more on the self "less" side of things, than on the self "ish" side of things." Malia May Johnson (My wife, best friend, lover, mother of my children(I love you too CJ), nurse, doctor, confidant, my right hand wo-man, and just about anything else that one person can be to another person)
"When haters knock you down, get back up and say- "You hit like a bitch!" Then do what you gotta do." Kristi IhaveonenamelikeMadonnabitch (A friend since college, and the only girl member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death)
"Behind every question, lies an answer, and behind every answer, lies the truth." Ben Dupont (Friend and family member)
"Our veterans are great. This day is to celebrate you. So let’s all pray, for the red, white and blue." David C. Johnson (My Dad)
My Favorite Quotes From People That I know Volume 9 by Michael "MJ The Terrible" Johnson - http://mjtheterrible.blogspot.com/2018/06/my-favorite-quotes-from-people-that-i.html
Tuesday, May 22, 2018
My Favorite Quotes From People That I know Volume 8 by Michael "MJ The Terrible" Johnson
Featured on the picture attached to this post- Tarica Patel, aka BABB (Bad Ass Bangalore Bitch) - (A contractor, an employee, a business partner, my "work wife", a friend, and she is engaged to one of my closest friends)
Quotes-
"Positive thoughts lead to a positive attitude, positive words, and positive actions." Tarica Patel, aka BABB (Bad Ass Bangalore Bitch) - (A contractor, an employee, a business partner, my "work wife", a friend, and she is engaged to one of my closest friends)
"I am against most of the ism's. Racism, sexism, and the other bad ism's. I am for optimism and positivism though. That's my stance on ism's." Kristi IhaveonenamelikeMadonnabitch (A friend since college, and the only girl member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death)
"With the right mindset, you never have to lose. You can either win or learn." Saggie Maggie (We went to college together at the University of Akron, and have been friends ever since.)
"The future belongs to those who embrace it." Dr. Frincke (The doctor whose experimental drug treatment program brought me back to life/kept me alive, after I suffered from a subdural hematoma rupture in 2015.)
"Be remembered for something. Be remembered for being a good dad or mom. Be remembered for being a good friend. Be remembered for your accomplishments. Be remembered for your contributions to society. Be remembered for your ____________." Malia May Johnson (My wife, best friend, lover, mother of my children(I love you too CJ), nurse, doctor, confidant, my right hand wo-man, and just about anything else that one person can be to another person)
"Having the right mindset is vital to becoming successful. Success is a mentality, before it is a reality." Gene Rockefeller (My newest friend, and an absolutely brilliant person)
"Don't take yourself out of the game. If you quit, you are sealing your own fate. If you keep trying, you've always got a shot." E. Fanning (Long-time friend and mentor)
"The formula for building trust- Truth and loyalty over a long enough period of time." Marcus Jennings (One of my closest friends, a member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death, and a business partner)
"Look forward, not backwards. Looking back at your past experiences can help you, but make sure you stay focused on your future." Tarica Patel, aka BABB (Bad Ass Bangalore Bitch) - (A contractor, an employee, a business partner, my "work wife", a friend, and she is engaged to one of my closest friends)
"Do what works. Struggling when you don’t have to is stupid. If Michael Jordan tried to teach you how to play basketball, would you tell him- “No, I am going to do it my way. I created my own way to play ball.” Do what works. If you are getting rich on something, who cares whose ideas it was." Derron Cook (Long-time friend and business mentor)
"Duplicate, don’t Innovate. Do what works! You don’t have to re-create the wheel. I appreciate the fact that you might want to create your own system, but you shouldn’t! Not until you have mastered a proven strategy. If you want to get creative after you have mastered what will feed you, then get creative." Derron Cook (Long-time friend and business mentor)
"You are not the mistakes of your past. You are a future of virtually endless possibilities, because of the accumulated life lessons and experiences you've had." Marcus Jennings (One of my closest friends, a member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death, and a business partner)
My Favorite Quotes From People That I know Volume 7 by Michael "MJ The Terrible" Johnson - http://mjtheterrible.blogspot.com/2018/05/my-favorite-quotes-from-people-that-i_18.html
Friday, May 18, 2018
My Favorite Quotes From People That I know Volume 7 by Michael "MJ The Terrible" Johnson
"They say you can't have it all, but then again, they say a lot of things that are complete bull shit. What do they know anyway?" Marcus Jennings (One of my closest friends, a member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death, and a business partner)
"Remember the time, when we couldn't remember that one time? Man, we had a great time!" Chris Hubbard (Friends since college, a.k.a. MJ#2)
"Tis the tits. It means something. It's a quote. Apply your own meaning to it." Brittany White (The biological mother, through egg donation, of my son CJ, and Head of Security for my family)
"There's a risk in getting to know people. There's an even bigger risk in not getting to know people." Ben Dupont (Friend and family member)
"They say you learn more from losing than from winning. What I learned from losing, was that I hate it. Now I refuse to lose. Lesson learned!" Kristi IhaveonenamelikeMadonnabitch (A friend since college, and the only girl member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death)
"You will never climb above your lot in life, unless you start trying to climb out of it." Gene Rockefeller (My newest friend, and an absolutely brilliant person)
"In business, if your idea doesn't work you're seen as crazy. If your idea does work, you're seen as a genious. Go figure." Kevin M. (Long-time friend, mentor, Head of Content for Masters of Money, and a member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death)
"It is possible to be ignorant, and still become successful, but the odds favor the open minded knowledge seekers. Never stop learning, because the more you know, the farther you will go.” Gene Rockefeller (My newest friend, and an absolutely brilliant person)
"Whoever said you can't have your cake and eat it to, didn't have a big enough imagination." Marcus Jennings (One of my closest friends, a member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death, and a business partner)
"Time heals almost everything. Give time, time." Malia May Johnson (My wife, best friend, lover, mother of my children(I love you too CJ), nurse, doctor, confidant, my right hand wo-man, and just about anything else that one person can be to another person)
"It's ok, you can keep being an asshole. I always leave bitch mode on in public, just incase I run into someone like you." Kristi IhaveonenamelikeMadonnabitch (A friend since college, and the only girl member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death)
My Favorite Quotes From People That I Know Volume 6 by Michael "MJ The Terrible" Johnson - http://mjtheterrible.blogspot.com/2018/05/my-favorite-quotes-from-people-that-i_9.html
Wednesday, May 9, 2018
My Favorite Quotes From People That I Know Volume 6 by Michael "MJ The Terrible" Johnson
"Our imagination is there to be used. In our imagination, we can be and do anything. What is in our imagination, is the key to our happiness." Gene Rockefeller (My newest friend, and an absolutely brilliant person)
"Don’t be that person that make excuses, and don't be afraid to try, because as it turns out, some of the people that would go on to improve and change the world the most, failed time and time again, until they finally got it right!" Kevin M. (Long-time friend, mentor, Head of Content for Masters of Money, and a member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death)
"Men.....Sometimes us girls just need to hear how much we mean to you. If you love us, tell us, and show us, and we will be there for you, and love you, more than you can imagine." Malia May Johnson (My wife, best friend, lover, mother of my children(I love you too CJ), nurse, doctor, confidant, my right hand wo-man, and just about anything else that one person can be to another person)
"A great future doesn't require having a great past. I am proof of that." Marcus Jennings (One of my closest friends, a member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death, and a business partner)
"Failure, also know as not succeeding yet, is temporary, if you don't let it be final." E. Fanning (Long-time friend and mentor)
"To much of a good thing, is never a good thing." Gene Rockefeller (My newest friend, and an absolutely brilliant person)
"Entrepreneurs, you don’t need to imagine 1000 great ideas. You just need one. You only have to be right/hit the ball once, to have a home run!" J.J. Mendelhaussen (Long-time friend and mentor)
"We all experience ups and downs, but life is what you make of it, so make it great!" Kevin M. (Long-time friend, mentor, Head of Content for Masters of Money, and a member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death)
"If you have to go where there is no path, make your own trail. Blaze the new trail so hard you leave a path behind you." Kristi IhaveonenamelikeMadonnabitch (A friend since college, and the only girl member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death)
My Favorite Quotes From People That I Know Volume 5 by Michael "MJ The Terrible" Johnson - http://mjtheterrible.blogspot.com/2018/05/my-favorite-quotes-from-people-that-i.html
Tuesday, May 1, 2018
Malia May Johnson's Life & Love Quotes
"How to keep a good man happy....Keep his brain focused, his heart racing, his belly full, his balls drained, believe in him, and be there for him." Malia May Johnson (My wife, best friend, lover, mother of my children(I love you too CJ), nurse, doctor, confidant, my right hand wo-man, and just about anything else that one person can be to another person)
"Fear can hold you prisoner. Hope can set you free, and action is what makes things happen." Malia May Johnson (My wife, best friend, lover, mother of my children(I love you too CJ), nurse, doctor, confidant, my right hand wo-man, and just about anything else that one person can be to another person)
"Ride the tide. You will be happy you tried, and it will be worth the ride." Malia May Johnson (My wife, best friend, lover, mother of my children(I love you too CJ), nurse, doctor, confidant, my right hand wo-man, and just about anything else that one person can be to another person)
"I don't know what the future holds, but if the future doesn't involve us being together, I have some bad news for this future fella, because he is going to be changing his plans." Malia May Johnson (My wife, best friend, lover, mother of my children(I love you too CJ), nurse, doctor, confidant, my right hand wo-man, and just about anything else that one person can be to another person)
"Men.....Women are like cars. If you take good care of them, they will be reliable, help you get where you want to be, create memories with you, and make you feel as comfortable as can be." Malia May Johnson (My wife, best friend, lover, mother of my children(I love you too CJ), nurse, doctor, confidant, my right hand wo-man, and just about anything else that one person can be to another person)
My Favorite Quotes From People That I know by Michael "MJ The Terrible" Johnson - http://mjtheterrible.blogspot.com/2018/03/my-favorite-quotes-from-people-that-i.html
Sunday, April 29, 2018
My Favorite Quotes From People That I Know Volume 4 by Michael "MJ The Terrible" Johnson
"When you do the time, you pay the crime. When you put in the time, you get paid and shine!" Derron Cook (Long-time friend and business mentor)
"Unrelenting effective effort will eventually, even under terrible conditions, still get you where you want to go!" Kevin M. (Long-time friend, mentor, Head of Content for Masters of Money, and a member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death)
"I'm really just like everyone else, until you make me mad. Then I turn into the girl version of the Incredible Hulk, and unleash havoc on your ass!" Brittany White (The biological mother, through egg donation, of my son CJ, and Head of Security for my family)
"Be so focused on what you want, that you don't even notice the unnecessary bullshit in life that tries to suck up all of your time and energy." Marcus Jennings (One of my closest friends, a member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death, and a business partner)
"Don't judge my life based on the part you came in at. It's not fair to me short-term, and you will regret it long-term." Kristi IhaveonenamelikeMadonnabitch (A friend since college, and the only girl member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death)
"Look forward, not backwards. Looking back at your past experiences can help you, but make sure you stay focused on your future!" Marcus Jennings (One of my closest friends, a member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death, and a business partner)
"I wanna make a difference in the world. If you wanna stand in my way, be my guest, but you were warned. #meanpeoplesuck" Kristi IhaveonenamelikeMadonnabitch (A friend since college, and the only girl member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death)
"It's a big world out there. Seek and you will likely find. Keep searching. I know what it is like to feel stuck, bored, down, depressed, hopeless, etc. What got me through it, was making the decision to keep going. Don't settle for being unhappy, when their is happiness to be found." Kevin M. (Long-time friend, mentor, Head of Content for Masters of Money, and a member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death)
"On the internet, and in real life, there will be people who may not agree with you, but you've gotta just push through, because there will always be people who do." Kevin M. (Long-time friend, mentor, Head of Content for Masters of Money, and a member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death)
"How to keep a good man happy....Keep his brain focused, his heart racing, his belly full, his balls drained, believe in him, and be there for him. Malia May Johnson (My wife, best friend, lover, mother of my children(I love you too CJ), nurse, doctor, confidant, my right hand wo-man, and just about anything else that one person can be to another person)
"I don't know what the future holds, but if the future doesn't involve us being together, I have some bad news for this future fella, because he is going to be changing his plans." Malia May Johnson (My wife, best friend, lover, mother of my children(I love you too CJ), nurse, doctor, confidant, my right hand wo-man, and just about anything else that one person can be to another person)
"Obstacles don’t have to stop you. If you run into a wall, don’t turn around and give up in defeat. Figure out how to climb it, dig under it, go through it, or get around it." Chris Hubbard (Friends since college, a.k.a. MJ#2)
My Favorite Quotes From People That I Know Volume III by Michael "MJ The Terrible" Johnson - http://mjtheterrible.blogspot.com/2018/04/my-favorite-quotes-from-people-that-i_19.html
Thursday, April 19, 2018
My Favorite Quotes From People That I Know Volume III by Michael "MJ The Terrible" Johnson
"Fear can hold you prisoner. Hope can set you free, and action is what makes things happen." Malia May Johnson (My wife, best friend, lover, mother of my children(I love you too CJ), nurse, doctor, confidant, my right hand wo-man, and just about anything else that one person can be to another person)
"I was born with all of the disadvantages a person can have. I couldn't control that. When I became an adult, I took control of the situation, and righted that wrong!" Marcus Jennings (One of my closest friends, a member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death, and a business partner)
"I am a fair person. Do not screw me over. If you do, I will get the last laugh. I don't care if it is 10 years from now. Got it? I sure as shit hope so!" Kristi IhaveonenamelikeMadonnabitch (A friend since college, and the only girl member of "MJ The Terrible" & Team Digital Death)
"Ride the tide. You will be happy you tried, and it will be worth the ride." Malia May Johnson (My wife, best friend, lover, mother of my children(I love you too CJ), nurse, doctor, confidant, my right hand wo-man, and just about anything else that one person can be to another person)
"I am going to rip my problems a new asshole. I was going to warn them it was coming, but they have been such a problem, that they deserve this!" Natalie Dupont Johnson (Queen Bee- It's a long story!)
"Men.....Women are like cars. If you take good care of them, they will be reliable, help you get where you want to be, create memories with you, and make you feel as comfortable as can be." Malia May Johnson (My wife, best friend, lover, mother of my children(I love you too CJ), nurse, doctor, confidant, my right hand wo-man, and just about anything else that one person can be to another person)
"I don't know if every woman can do the same things that a man can do. I don't know if every man can do the same things that a woman can do. What I do know is, the women and men who bust their butts, tend to succeed in what they do. Find the lesson in that lazy bumpkins." Brittany White (The biological mother, through egg donation, of my son CJ, and Head of Security for my family)
"Wrong, right, good, bad. Most things in life are our choice to do or not do. There is power in that. I don't think most people get how much power they have to improve their lives, but I wish they did." Pete Dowdle (Long-time friend and bodyguard)
"There are 2 types of people in this world. Those who take action, and those who don't. Since the one's who take action seem to reap all of the rewards, if you are in the don't take action group, do yourself a favor, and switch over to the the take action side." Chris Hubbard (Friends since college, a.k.a. MJ#2)
My Favorite Quotes From People That I Know Volume II by Michael "MJ The Terrible" Johnson - http://mjtheterrible.blogspot.com/2018/04/my-favorite-quotes-from-people-that-i.html